The Struggle

About three years ago, I read the book Available by Matteson Perry, which explained the male mind to me when it comes to dating. There was one anecdote, nay, one phrase that stuck out to me and has stayed with me these many years that I repeat often to friends and acquaintances. I’m paraphrasing here, but it was something along the lines of “I invited her over for dinner, not because I'm a particularly good cook, but because my kitchen is near my bedroom.” Men plan ahead like that, ladies, for very specific circumstances. With this bit of information thoroughly bookmarked in the back of my mind, it was no surprise that when George suggested we go back to his for wine, it was maybe a five to ten minute walk away from where we were. George lives on the top floor of a house; through conversation I learned that he owns the entire house, but that the bottom floor needs renovation. As I ascend the stairs, I pass by a number of photos of men in uniform – photos from his t...

“I just ran 20 miles and I have no plans for the rest of the day, what should I do?” I was lying on my bed in my Bed and Breakfast in London, ten days into my holiday, resting after a 3.5 hour run and very large meal at Five Guys right after. I was swiping through Bumble and trying my luck. I was supposed to meet up with a man who used to be the resident manager for my student building when I lived in London in 2013-2014. We had been talking regularly for weeks about it, and then as of a couple nights before, he stopped responding to me, unfollowed me on Instagram and completely disappeared. But I was on Holiday – and damn it, I was not going to spend the night on my own. George’s profile stands out to me, he’s in a UK military coat, but appears to be dancing around enjoying life in his main profile photo. (I deleted Bumble and George has kindly shared screenshots of his conversation with me for me to use so these messages are from his perspective). George and I set a...